Still here! But MELTING!

I can’t be doing this in reverse order, it goes against the grain, plus I’m on holiday, plus I’m idle. So…

DAY 3 – Friday 28 May 2010

Woke. Tent in darkness. Great, grey stuff again. But no! Tent in shade and the day is GLORIOUS.

No drive today (one day on, one day off, to keep my husband alive to the end of the journey … and me too!) Took a long walk along the glorious beach to the White Cliffs at the end, which intrigued us because it was a layer of soft chalk interspersed with a thin layer of what looked like hard flint – what causes that? Hubs stood beneath the cliffs, saw how soft the chalk was, and said, “I don’t feel safe standing here.”

“It’s been there for millions of years!” I laughed.

“Yeah,” he said, “But this piece of flint here could be the keystone to the whole thing.”

“Then stop digging out flint then!”

The sea was a beautiful colour under a cloudless blue sky – azure is the word that springs to mind, but I’m not entirely sure what azure is, so let’s say pretty green.

Drive to a supermarket afterwards for provisions (bread and beer, staples). We needed ice for the coolbox (where all the collected cheeses are literally running riot), but couldn’t remember what ‘ice’ was in French. I picked up a bottle of water, showed it to a shop assistant, and shivered with hypothermia. She got it right away – give that Fastfingers an Oscar – but no, they had no ‘glace’.

Chilled for rest of glorious day on peaceful campsite, having an afternoon nap despite 10 hours sleep last night.

Burgers, sausages and salad (and obligatory bread) for dinner in the sunshine. Well chilled.

Not sure if it’s the fresh air, the travelling or all the unaccustomed exercise we’re doing (hard to exercise when you sit in a comfy chair typing for most of the day), but we were in bed before 8pm, firstly reading, then yakking, then sleeping. First good night’s sleep so far, no fever and no nightmares. Phew.

The airbed is well comfortable, as are the two blow-up pillows we bought from Poundland (yeah, Poundland) – better than our pillows at home in fact. The tent is a masterpiece of design – Coleman Waterfall 5, big enough for five (supposedly) but certainly roomy enough for two. Our Camping Gaz camping chef cooker is perfect on top of the B&Q folding BBQ. All in all, we’re very comfortable.

A note about our Municipal campsite (Municipal is council run and they have to maintain certain standards… they’re also very cheap). This one is run by a very bubbly receptionist/manager and her VERY handsome husband, and the place is IMMACULATE. We’ll be hard pushed to tear ourselves away tomorrow. It also has free wifi so managed to send a couple of emails home to make sure everything’s okay (already!).

Time to put up tent: 0
Camping: 0€
Provisions: 43€
Miles covered: 0


Day 4 – Saturday 29 May – VEULETTES to COURSEULLES SUR MER

We’re using an AA Roap Map of Europe. That’s the WHOLE of Europe, so it only shows the main roads and we’re trying to use the ‘scenic routes’. We got hopelessly lost in the middle of nowhere, mostly, it has to be said, because we were trying to avoid Le Havre.

So we’re parked at the side of the road underneath a roadsign trying to figure out where the hell we were when a car stops in front of us. A man in a stylish pink jumper gets out, quite handsome I thought, before thinking he’s probably coming back to kill us while we’re alone and lost. He’s not, of course. “Can I ‘elp you?” he says.

Kwoar! I thought.

He looked at our road map and even he, who lived there, couldn’t figure out where we were or how we could get to where we wanted to be. He sent us back the way we came, which started us bickering (Hubs RUDELY accusing me of not being able to mapread, the swine… my directions mostly consisted of shrieking “We’re going the wrong way!”). Then Hubs ran a red light and I made him stop while I got out, walked down the pathway a bit, smoking and muttering.

What we had to do in the end was… go the wrong way. We had to swing round ROUEN and double back on ourselves towards CAEN on the motorway… the TOLL motorway. I was gutted as I handed over euros. Plus is was lashing down with berluddy rain, and then we came to yet ANOTHER toll booth.

“4€!” I cried.

“The devil himself couldn’t get me off this road until I have Reached My Destination!” Hubs hissed. Fair enough.

Drove through a town. “Shall we stay here?” Hubs asked, pulling up at a campsite in the middle of nowhere. Hubs’ criteria for a campsite is easy: whichever is closest when he’s had enough of driving. My criteria involves: is it in a nice location, does it have a view, and what’s the atmosphere, the FEEL of the place like?

“Nah, not here”, I said to Hubs, and on we drove, Hubs muttering under his breath until I forced him to stop somewhere, where looking at an old tanker gun from WWII calmed him down.

Campsite up the road fine, next to sea with a good ambience about it… and within our budget too (15€ a night). “Parlez vous Anglaise?” we asked the girl on reception. “Yes,” she replied. ‘Oh good,’ said Hubs, and launched (as he’s apt to do at regular intervals) into a monologue of where we’d been and where we were going. You could see from the look on the girl’s face that she was thinking ‘That’s not even English he’s speaking!’

“Where do we go, love?” Hubs asked after he’d paid.

“Follow me and I’ll show you,” she said, hopping onto a pushbike and guiding us at a leisurely pace across the campsite (not quite as nice as the last one, but good shower and toilet facilities, so not as bad as the first one either… in fact, I’m sure nothing could be as bad as the first one).

Bickered putting the tent up in gale force wind. We were tired, but we don’t stay annoyed with each other for long, and we soon chased the tent down on the beach.

Aaaaand… chill.

Two things made me laugh my lungs up tonight. One was Hubs coming into the bedroom area, which doesn’t sound at all funny does it, but because we’d pinned the tent down TIGHT against the wind all the door entrances were raised from the floor. He tripped. Usually a cause for concern, it must be said, but he just felled like a tree, looking at me the whole time as he went (“You appear to be going sideways, dear… oh, it’s me”) like something Basil Fawlty would do, and he fell onto softish ground so nothing was broken or injured and there was no blood involved, so that’s good. And as he lay there, watching me trying to draw breath with tears squirting from my eyes, he lifted the corner of the airbed and cried, “Yes, everything’s fine under here, dear.”

Then he went to fill the water carrier. He came back dripping wet, which again had me laughing like a drain. It’s these little moments that count.

Having eaten croissants and pastries en route (when in Rome and all that), had Sainsbury’s sweet and sour chicken and Aldi Irish stew for ‘tea’… and very nice it was too (washed down with wine and Stella).

And so… to bed. 8pm. We’re such lightweights.

* Before the trip I bought an inverter charger for the car, at great expense, to charge up the laptop. Had it on for two hours yesterday as we traversed northern France, but the laptop didn’t charge at all (yet it would charge the mobile phone… not at the same time of course). I now have a Dead Laptop. This laptop is No More. Which is rather annoying. I now have writer’s cramp of the chronic kind and have been forced to acknowledge that my handwriting is truly appalling.

Time to put up tent: 45 mins.
Camping: 30€
Provisions: 3€ (croissants and bread)
Berluddy toll roads: 9€
Miles covered: 173 (which is like a right lot considering we hardly went anywhere).

Day 5 – Sunday 30 May

Yet another night’s disturbed sleep (plus I’m bunged up, literally, to the eyeballs with swollen sinuses). First there was the music and screaming coming from somewhere on site (suspect it may have been the Eurovision Song Contest as the croissant man was terribly excited that Germany won this morning). Then there was the gale force wind beating up our tent. And then there was the crashing, and I mean CRASHING, of the waves of the sea behind us.

I dreamt I went home and Small Son told me the dog went missing the day after we left, and that he was going out with both his new girlfriend AND his old girlfriend – nightmares!

Plus the airbed has a leak so we had to pump it up in the night.

Cloudy today but warm with occasional sun – any TV channels that want me as a weather girl, get in touch..

Big day. Went to Omaha beach and the American war cemetery, which Hubs has always wanted to see. He gave me – and anybody else who would listen – a brief (well, not so brief actually) history of the fighting on the shores.

Stopped to see the gun bits and temporary port (Mulberry Harbour) they’d built in the war, and I was fine with all that… until I saw a photograph of a young soldier who was the image of one of my sons, and then it was just like I’d been punched in the stomach. Unusually for me, I was overwhelmed with emotion and started crying. Couldn’t stop.

We drove on to the war cemetery. I said I wasn’t going in, would wait for Hubs outside in the car, but I did go in, and I’m so glad that I did. The atmosphere was palpable as hundreds of people walked around the thousands of white cross graves in total silence. We were honoured to watch a ceremony attended by French and American dignitaries to celebrate the anniversary of the D-Day landings in 1944. It was very emotional. VERY emotional. I’m so glad I went.

Then on to Bayeux to see the tapestry, which I was very excited about as we’d studied it at school, never thought I’d see it for real. Hubs and I had a mild bicker as we wandered round the shops trying to decide what to have for lunch in the multitude of restaurants. Hubs picked pizza! Worse, it came complete with FROZEN scallops. “Don’t eat those” I said, as Hubs popped one into his mouth and crunched it, “You’ll die of food poisoning.” He’s still alive as I write this some hours later, but then he’s had to tolerate my cooking for the last 10 years so maybe he’s built up an immunity. (“Bon appetite’ someone said to us as they passed, which was nice).

Tapestry was AMAZING, berluddy long (70 yards… it went round a corner). The audio guide (which was included in the entry price, unlike some of the places in the UK) was a bit rushed though. “In scene one we see Harold, in scene two we see… in scene three..” All these people were shuffling sideways at a vast rate of knots down the dark, bendy corridor. Afterwards we went in search of a shop to top up on provisions (“Beer!” cried Hubs), but zut alors, shops are shut on Sunday, even the big ones. Hubs was gutted, but not half as much as I was when I realised he’d be drinking my finest Scotch whisky.

Trouble at reception when we arrived back at the campsite. Irish travellers with huge caravans were trying to bully the young receptionist into letting them in. We hung around to keep an eye on her, but luckily they gave up and went. The girl thanked Hubs.

Tried to find leak in airbed. Failed. We wake up on hard ground in the morning.

* Driving on the wrong side of the road (the right) has completely thrown my senses. I say “Turn left” when I mean right and visa versa. Its most strange and doesn’t improve relations between me and the driver, who simply wants to know where to go. I have to exercise ‘prudence’ (which cracks me up every time I see it on a roadsign… prudence).

* I noticed I’m getting some strange looks in our right-hand car. As we’re going round traffic island and I’m looking the other way, twiddling my hair, people double-glance, obviously thinking ‘That driver has a very relaxed attitude to driving’. Sometimes I pretend to drive using an invisible steering wheel. I might buy one of those children’s toy ones to stick on the dashboard.

* Hubs taught me to play poker tonight, which is well boring unless actual money is involved, and when actual money is involved I berluddy well lost it all so I ain’t playing that again.

Time to put up tent: 0
Camping: 0€
Provisions: 3€
Miles covered: 66


Day 6 – Monday 31 May - – COURSEULLES to LE MONT ST. MICHEL

Fortunately, considering the shops weren’t open yesterday, they WERE open today because its not a Bank Holiday in France as at home, so we didn’t starve to death.

Airbed went down completely in the night. Hubs blew it back up and finally found the leak. When you take the bung out of it, it sounds just like a De Laurean car coming Back To The Future.

Bloooo sky! Yeeeehaaaaa.

Today we packed up the tent and didn’t bicker once… go us! We’re gelling. We haven’t gelled in a while. We’re settling into the rhythm of the journey now.

We can’t seem to buy bags of ice for the coolbox (I mean, c’mon, they even sell them at Sommerfield). In a moment of pure genius, which admittedly doesn’t happen often, maybe once every decade or so, I decided to buy a bag of peas and a bag of potato square things instead… ice for the coolbox and food for later too.

First sight of Le Mont St Michel in the distance as we approached it very exciting. Drove towards it, but there was paid-for parking at the end and, as we were still loaded up with camping gear, we turned around, planning to visit the amazing place tomorrow on our day off.

Found a campsite right nearby, which is always worrying in case you can’t find anywhere and end up sleeping in the car. Fortunately, by keeping to the coast and all the ‘tourist’ areas, there doesn’t seem to be any shortages of places to stay. Not sure if its like that inland, but here we’re almost spoilt for choice. Looked like a right posh place when we pulled in and it didn’t have the magical word ‘Municipal’ on the signs either, but surprisingly it was still only 15€ per night. Smaller site than the last two (bit cramped I thought, and most of the others seem to be campervans, some of them massive), but pleasant enough.

Set up the tent in total silence, we both know what we’re doing now. First day took over an hour to set everything up, today it took us only 35 minutes… I think that’s pretty good going.

Chicken cooked outside tonight with some of those square potato things – not quite sure what they are actually.

And then a strange thing happened. Despite having had a nice day and the sun was shining and we were trying not to scorch in direct sunlight, Hubs and I fell out. Not bickering but REALLY falling out… to the extent that I walked off and sat outside the campsite on the main road. A French man, returning to his tour coach (he was the driver), stared at me for a long time while I pretended not to notice, and then he said, “Mademoiselle?” I looked over and saw he was holding up the door to his (empty) coach. There was a strange look on his face.

I suddenly realised that I was sitting there, alone, wearing only a t-shirt and a very small pair of shorts… well, I am on holiday and style has never exactly been my forte. I don’t know what he thought I was doing there on my own, but I felt two things instantaneously… (a) cheeky git, and (b) he was only a young thang so I must still Have It (whoohoo!).

Went back to tent and we did the silent back treatment in a sleeping bag all night.

Bugger!

Day 7 – Tuesday 1 June 2010

Absolutely crap day. There’s always one. I know there’s always one on every trip, but it still takes me by surprise when it comes.

Hubs and I still not speaking. It doesn’t help either that its absolutely TEAMING down with rain. What the hell happened to the bloo skies of yesterday? I mean it LASHED down relentlessly.

Read. Didn’t speak. Wandered off to look at the sea but ended up at some dreary port town (St Malo). Came back, still not speaking, read some more.

Finally, a break. Discovered how to get my laptop to charge (use a different plug adaptor as we have two). I’m sitting here now in the TV room, laptop plugged in, typing this, as a German couple who are cycling through several countries sit and watch a German quiz show.

Hubs and I started talking again. I don’t know what it is. Its almost like we have to overload and then reboot in order to get back on an even keel again. Road trips, love ‘em, but if there’s any hairline cracks anywhere they’re gonna show up as big as the Grand Canyon.

But at least we’re friends again now.



Oooh, I don't like leaving it on a downer... there IS some good stuff to come (including pictures), just as soon as (a) I can find a plug socket that actually works in order to charge up my laptop or (b) figure out how to use the USELESS e:can charger thing in the car which DOESN'T work, and (c) actually find WiFi. Campsites advertise 'WiFi', but they usually mean a computer in the lobby somewhere that has all the 'portholes' blocked off so you can't download up upload anything, and some are even restricted to French sites only, which isn't terribly helpful when you can't actually speak French. Anyway, holiday IS going fab, and every time we move on it just gets hotter and hotter. S'great.